my greatest loves and most persistent teachers keep me on my path; sitting under the bodhi tree and breathing
Showing posts with label holiday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label holiday. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Family Holiday (Part 2)
I'm having one of those days where i feel like i want to curl up, cry a lot sleep, get spoon-fed, fall back to sleep, cry some more...not sure what happened but woke up in a super funk and cannot shake it. If i had a "real" job i would most definitley call in sick and lounge around all day in my underwear eating ice cream. But, since I have two littles who do not allow me any time off i have tried to do the above with almost no luck.
Cuz, when mama is cranky, the babes are a mess! And i don't have what it takes to shift their drama. Heck, i can't even pull myself together! What's a mama to do?
I felt similar a couple of weeks back when we came back from our precious holiday. Two weeks surrounded by special peeps, my peeps where i felt seen, loved and was hugged multiple times a day to coming back to no family, almost no community and boxes in a garage...it was a bit depressing to say the least.
Those weeks with my fam gave me a dose of that feeling of tribe, of community that i long for so ardently.
I know in my depth that it is possible to live in an environment that is quite unlike the structures that have been patch-worked together but that is something much more soul- satisfying. Maybe you already have a closely knit community of family and friends who nurture you, help you raise your children, whom you cook with and garden with. I feel like i am far away from anything that resembles that and i have such a desire to create it for my family.
If only i could get some of these folks living in one town, I'd be off to a great start!
Until we get our butts back to Boulder to be with what feels most like home, I have my sweet mini tribe and a few special peeps who keep me going
Here's where much of the action happened...the eating, the chopping, the washing, the snacking, the nibbling. There was so much eating going on almost nonstop and i did my fair share and subsequently smuggled 4 pounds of myself back to Panama!
We ventured out of our perfect compound and away from the beach a total of 3 times of the two week stay. Here we took the girls out on the town. This shop owner said in english with his great mexican accent "this is your day. come into my shop. today everything is almost free for you"
We found a sweet shop with a courtyard in the back with books, yummy smoothies and amazing home-ade popsicles!
In coming back to the house we wondered if it was necessary to leave again....ever!
I loved watching my babes play half naked with their strollers, their own babies and their innocence. Ahhh childhood.
(stay tuned for part 3)
Cuz, when mama is cranky, the babes are a mess! And i don't have what it takes to shift their drama. Heck, i can't even pull myself together! What's a mama to do?
I felt similar a couple of weeks back when we came back from our precious holiday. Two weeks surrounded by special peeps, my peeps where i felt seen, loved and was hugged multiple times a day to coming back to no family, almost no community and boxes in a garage...it was a bit depressing to say the least.
Those weeks with my fam gave me a dose of that feeling of tribe, of community that i long for so ardently.
I know in my depth that it is possible to live in an environment that is quite unlike the structures that have been patch-worked together but that is something much more soul- satisfying. Maybe you already have a closely knit community of family and friends who nurture you, help you raise your children, whom you cook with and garden with. I feel like i am far away from anything that resembles that and i have such a desire to create it for my family.
If only i could get some of these folks living in one town, I'd be off to a great start!
Until we get our butts back to Boulder to be with what feels most like home, I have my sweet mini tribe and a few special peeps who keep me going
Here's where much of the action happened...the eating, the chopping, the washing, the snacking, the nibbling. There was so much eating going on almost nonstop and i did my fair share and subsequently smuggled 4 pounds of myself back to Panama!
We ventured out of our perfect compound and away from the beach a total of 3 times of the two week stay. Here we took the girls out on the town. This shop owner said in english with his great mexican accent "this is your day. come into my shop. today everything is almost free for you"
We found a sweet shop with a courtyard in the back with books, yummy smoothies and amazing home-ade popsicles!
In coming back to the house we wondered if it was necessary to leave again....ever!
I loved watching my babes play half naked with their strollers, their own babies and their innocence. Ahhh childhood.
(stay tuned for part 3)
Monday, January 17, 2011
Family Holiday 2010 (Part 1)
Happy 2011!
I am back and finally have a moment to sit and write. We moved out of our Paitilla apartment on December 17th and put everything into my mother's garage and then left for our Christmas vacation on the 18th. A little hectic but the anticipation of our 2 week retreat on the aqua beaches of Tulum, Mexico was keeping me going.
Abel and I have been to Tulum 3 times prior and it is our favorite beach getaway. It is heaven with pink shell speckled white sand and crystal clear waters. There is a strip of eco resorts far away (one and a half hours drive) from the craziness of the the strip-mall-all-inclusive-spring-break destination that is Cancun.
Our first trip was on our honeymoon, another a year later and then with little Aiyana when she was 10 months old. And now we were back with two babes! Time flies! this time we met my brothers, sister, her beau and our sweet niece Bella along wiht my little sis, my mom and her husband at an amazing house rented for the holidays (thank you mom and david!!).
Our little slice of paradise
We were secluded from everything and could hear the crashing waves from our window. I slept like a log every night and relished in the serenity, the quiet, the fresh air. It nourished dormant cells in my body.
my girls were free to run and play everyday in the sand and waves. It was sweet to see them enjoy this sacred place especially after living in an apartment for a year. I felt us sink deep into the arms of mother earth.
the rooftop deck was a good place for sweet conversation
I love, love, love my family. There are 5 of us kids and us 2 older sisters have very special mates and delicious daughters. So, all in all we are a herd of 12 and we all stayed under a single roof for two weeks with no yelling and minimal tears. We are all very easy going and appreciate these moments once a year where we get to love on each other. Oh, we have our issues. Don't get me wrong. It is not all peaches. But, we have much love for each other and truly soak in the time we have. It is yummy!
Isabella Grace is my precious 10 year old niece whose imagination is endless and her patience is strong. Aiayana and Bella were lost most days in their own beautiful world of babies, restaurants, fairies....we cried hard tears when we left and Aiyana asked on the plane ride home "does Bella miss me?"
more to come.............
I am back and finally have a moment to sit and write. We moved out of our Paitilla apartment on December 17th and put everything into my mother's garage and then left for our Christmas vacation on the 18th. A little hectic but the anticipation of our 2 week retreat on the aqua beaches of Tulum, Mexico was keeping me going.
Abel and I have been to Tulum 3 times prior and it is our favorite beach getaway. It is heaven with pink shell speckled white sand and crystal clear waters. There is a strip of eco resorts far away (one and a half hours drive) from the craziness of the the strip-mall-all-inclusive-spring-break destination that is Cancun.
Our first trip was on our honeymoon, another a year later and then with little Aiyana when she was 10 months old. And now we were back with two babes! Time flies! this time we met my brothers, sister, her beau and our sweet niece Bella along wiht my little sis, my mom and her husband at an amazing house rented for the holidays (thank you mom and david!!).
Our little slice of paradise
We were secluded from everything and could hear the crashing waves from our window. I slept like a log every night and relished in the serenity, the quiet, the fresh air. It nourished dormant cells in my body.
my girls were free to run and play everyday in the sand and waves. It was sweet to see them enjoy this sacred place especially after living in an apartment for a year. I felt us sink deep into the arms of mother earth.
the rooftop deck was a good place for sweet conversation
I love, love, love my family. There are 5 of us kids and us 2 older sisters have very special mates and delicious daughters. So, all in all we are a herd of 12 and we all stayed under a single roof for two weeks with no yelling and minimal tears. We are all very easy going and appreciate these moments once a year where we get to love on each other. Oh, we have our issues. Don't get me wrong. It is not all peaches. But, we have much love for each other and truly soak in the time we have. It is yummy!
Isabella Grace is my precious 10 year old niece whose imagination is endless and her patience is strong. Aiayana and Bella were lost most days in their own beautiful world of babies, restaurants, fairies....we cried hard tears when we left and Aiyana asked on the plane ride home "does Bella miss me?"
more to come.............
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Halloween!
Celebrating holidays with little ones is sooo much fun! I am much more inspired, now that i have children, to put in the effort to make a holiday festive. I love fall with the colors, the squash, the roasted seeds, the hot tea and all the yummy baking. However, halloween was never really one of my favorite celebrations. Probably because my mom always avoided it like the plague. Spooky, scary costumes, spiders, and candy are not my mom's idea of a good time. She is and has always been into natural foods and the idea of even passing out sugar anything to innocent children is absolutely out of the question. So, in order to avoid my mom passing out pencils or raisins we all hid in one room with the lights out while the trick or treaters passed us by. I think in high school my friends made me go to one house and say trick or treat as some kind of rite of passage.
There were a few years in elementary schoolwhen we lived in our spiritual community in California that the parents and teachers created a magical journey full of beautiful costumes, tents, riddles, lake crossings, homemade sweets and prizes. This really set the standard for halloween and nothing has been able to match it. Although, i hear that many waldorf schools pull off a magical experience for their communities which i am excited to be a part of by next halloween with my littles!
Nonetheless, we had a wonderful celebration here in Panama. With trick or treating and all! And we made it through without a lick of candy!
my three angels...i adore them! (why can't they just smile for the pic?)
Satya trying out her magic wand on Oso. she said "poof"
Aiyana loved to say "trick or treat" really loudly!
she thought this was way cool!
the trick or treaters!
satya's thoughts on the evening
it started raining so we ran back to the party for a little drumming
fortunately, we got home just in time to light our jack 'o lantern candle (sin pumpkin as it got moldy and grew green hair a few days before) and leave all the candy out for the halloween fairies....because they trade candy for a gift for those kids who don't eat candy.....
and in just a little while the candy was gone a new train and some tracks were left! thank you jack o lantern fairy!!!!
testing out the new tracks!
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Home is where the heart is......
Oh, I ache. My heart physically hurts and the tears are surfacing. I have been feeling like I want to go home lately. I didnt know i had a "home" or where that might be as i have moved so frequently in my life and my family is spread out over the globe. But now that i am here in Panama i think about Boulder as my home. It is the place i find myself yearning to return to. After we visited a few months past I returned here so detached to the people and the town of bloulder. It was a strange feeling. At the beginning of my visit i was scheming to stay for good and then by the end i was wanting to go home to Panama. It was a strange sensation but i was glad to not be wanting so badly what i couldnt have. I think i expected that all my empty parts would be filled by those that i had been missing so deeply. And i was disappointed. We all get busy with the days, with our lives and we don't have time to nourish the village in a way that i crave. So, i detached and pretended that those things no longer held the same weight in my heart when in fact they do.
And now? I want to go again. It didnt last long. I think mainly i just miss being around people that i know and who know me where we can do the small talk or we can ask deep questions or we can just enjoy the moment so freely without much judgement. I want to create the village that i hold in my heart. I want my children to be around men and women who hold similar truths and who strive to be authentic. I want to be supported by others who live in a way that i do and who can help me to deepen my spiritual practice and bring vision to child rearing and education. Here, i feel that i am doing it solo and am having to defend my views from the "norm" which leaves me weakened and doubtful.
I feel like i am waiting to return. Waiting to be a part...and i dont like to live like that. It is a constant reminder to stay present and to fully take each moment, each day while i am here and live to its greatest potential. And maybe some moments have the greatest potential for buckets of tears or raw, pillow-punching, tiger-growling tantrums!!!!
my gorgeous niece Bella pushing Aiyana on a tire swing at her new house in the mountains...i miss that fresh air without exhaust, cars honking, trash everywhere...pure, raw, silent nature
Back of the Trident, my favorite coffee house! where they have a sandbox for the babes, soymilk options, organic teas, friendly passers-by, english books galore, oh and a Chipotle across the way!!!....its the little things
Love from Auntie Lia, irreplaceable...we need it daily!
Cousins...how can i keep them apart?
dinners with friends and family made with fresh, organic produce straight from the garden...oh, i neeeeed this!
And the wide, traffic-less community walking areas....ahhhhh. i'm telling you, it's strange the things we miss....its home
And now? I want to go again. It didnt last long. I think mainly i just miss being around people that i know and who know me where we can do the small talk or we can ask deep questions or we can just enjoy the moment so freely without much judgement. I want to create the village that i hold in my heart. I want my children to be around men and women who hold similar truths and who strive to be authentic. I want to be supported by others who live in a way that i do and who can help me to deepen my spiritual practice and bring vision to child rearing and education. Here, i feel that i am doing it solo and am having to defend my views from the "norm" which leaves me weakened and doubtful.
I feel like i am waiting to return. Waiting to be a part...and i dont like to live like that. It is a constant reminder to stay present and to fully take each moment, each day while i am here and live to its greatest potential. And maybe some moments have the greatest potential for buckets of tears or raw, pillow-punching, tiger-growling tantrums!!!!
my gorgeous niece Bella pushing Aiyana on a tire swing at her new house in the mountains...i miss that fresh air without exhaust, cars honking, trash everywhere...pure, raw, silent nature
Back of the Trident, my favorite coffee house! where they have a sandbox for the babes, soymilk options, organic teas, friendly passers-by, english books galore, oh and a Chipotle across the way!!!....its the little things
Love from Auntie Lia, irreplaceable...we need it daily!
Cousins...how can i keep them apart?
dinners with friends and family made with fresh, organic produce straight from the garden...oh, i neeeeed this!
And the wide, traffic-less community walking areas....ahhhhh. i'm telling you, it's strange the things we miss....its home
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