Slightly blurred vision, light headed, dry and cracking hands, oily massaged face, and yoga pants. I have cleaned the kitchen twice, taken a shower, given myself an oil massage, drank coffee, texted randomly, shopped online without a single checkout and have forgotten to eat lunch. My children and husband have been out of the hose since 10:30. It is now 2:30 and my heart is still racing (possibly from too much caffeine) trying to figure out how to relax and fully rejuvenate before they return, which at this point could be soon.
So i find myself wiping the crumbs off the counter, sweeping the hall, putting a few things away, lying in bed for a few minutes and basically trying to stuff this solitude and peace down my throat til i feel it in my toes. AND IT DOES NOT WORK. I feel nothing.
i think the real problem is that i have too many things to accomplish and sometimes i dont know where to start. I know that i need self care and that should be priority whenever i have moments alone and yet i also need to use the time to put our house back together after a long drawn out rebuild after the flood that began two and a half months ago. There are boxes in every room and random things scattered everywhere. I can hardly relax in this space and yet that is what my body and mind yearns for.
A good question for all of us mamas: how do we care for ourselves, our bodies? What things make us feel juicy and loved? And how can we incorporate things daily into our lives? what small things can we do for ourselves that make the day sweeter?